So here goes nothing I am about to say the one thing that I have been afraid to say out loud for a little while now.....
I Want a BABY.
There, I said it now I can breath easy, well sort of. Not sure when these thoughts started creeping in my mind. But they started and now I spend lots of time thinking about it probably over thinking but here is why:
Truth is that is a terrifying statement for me to make. Little man is 19 months, over a year and a half growing big, starting to talk, and getting into all sorts of trouble. It seems as everything is falling into place, we are going to start potty training this summer sometime, we have the space and I feel like I have my energy back (well as much energy as a mom of a toddler can have).
I think about all these things and then I start to doubt, do I have enough love to share? How will my little man who has been the center of our world for his whole life adjust? How will we adapt? Am I really and truly ready?? I spent the first 20 or more weeks of my first pregnancy sick, when they say "morning" sickness they should really call it all day sickness (unless I was eating goldfish). Am I ready for that?
I feel like I have read all the articles and prepared as much as I can. Not sure where to go from here jump in or slowly wade into it one toe at a time. That's where I am. That's how I feel, at the end of the day God will work it all out and it will be just fine. So until then I wait, for what I am not sure but I will wait.
