Confessions….Reasons I sometimes don’t feel like a good mommy:

1. I don’t always have the best patience. This normally happens right around meal times or just on a day where little man is being extra grumpy. We both get frustrated and mommy loses her patience.
2. I let me son watch cartoons in the morning and sometimes an afternoon Elmo pick me up. Though he may love his Elmo the tv times are definitely more for mommy than baby! 6:30 is early by anyone’s standards and that is when little man gets up every day. So, while mommy drinks her coffee and tries to feel “human” again. Little man watches Elmo and Curious George while he plays.
3. I let me son “cry it out”. Yep I did, and I would do it again if I had to. Let me explain, my son started sleeping through the night early (like 8 weeks). We moved from TX to Pa and he stopped. Getting up every 3 hours like he was a newborn again.  After about a month of this (when we thought he has adjusted in all other ways) my husband and I had to train him to sleep through the night again. And it was hard.
4. I cherish nap-time A LOT J When I think about this one, what mom does not like nap time? But, it can easily become something that I value to much on a grumpy day when he refuses to go down and then only naps for an hour!!!
5. Sometimes I want to run away. I am sure we have all felt this way but ugh it gets me. I need some mommy time everyday and without it I get bad. Enough said. 

Then I Remember: 

1. My morning Smiles and night time cuddles. Oh how I love these. My son sees me in the morning and gives me the biggest smiles. At night (when he is in a good mood of course) he will hold my hand let me rub his head.
2. The joy I have watching him learn. He took his first steps yesterday and it brought tears to me eyes. I love him and how when he learns something new he can’t wait to show us. He knows “so big” and just sits with his arms up waiting for us to go “how big is Noah”;“So BIG”
3. The jibber jabber.  The dadadadada J
4. All of his firsts.
5. How he reaches for me.  I waited for this for months and it’s the best feeling knowing he wants me!
6. I can comfort him. Does a mama’s heart good when he is inconsolable and I am the only one who can get him to calm down (it’s also very frustrating when I am trying to do something but hey give and take right?)
7. He Loves Me. Sometimes I struggle with this one. I am home with him all day so sometimes I feel like to him I am an “old hat”. Then he crawls over grabs my face and lays a BIG FAT SLOBBERY kiss on me.
8. I Love Him. More than he will ever know.
9. This will not last forever and one day I will miss this.  I think back to when he was first born this tiny little sweet monkey man. Now my Monkey Man has grown and changed and starting to walk. He will never be this small again I will miss this. (sometimes I need that reminder though)
10. On the rainiest and grumpiest of days he is my son, the one that God formed and fashioned in me.